lintelsoups (lintelsoups) wrote,
lintelsoups
lintelsoups

  • Music:

The Host (picspam/spoilers/retardness)


I realize this movie is old. But all the more reason to post spoilers!
It's not that old.. you know kids now a days...



Crazy whitey came over and told your people pour formaldehyde down the drain into the Han River. Now you've got some crazy mutant fish.
Also he goes on to say "how many tails did that thing have?" ...it only had one, bro.


this is alcohol
Superior parenting. By far.


SHIT. RUN FATTY. That big ass tadpole is hungry.


Okay, so it's not a tadpole.. It's actually a mutant made up of joined together fish. You never really get to hear about what the guy is; just that he's really hungry and can eat people.


inb4 tentacle rape. Btw, that's his ONE tail. He uses it to grab up young schoolgirls or throw people into concusions. The monster has a real knack of knocking people out...


See? Tadpole.


I saw snowblood apple say the humor in this was for 8 year olds. Man, fuck you. There were amusing parts, like this one.
Omg at them rolling around on the floor.


They all think she's dead, but she's really safe in a very dirty sewer.
Along with some dead bodies to keep her company.


Meanwhile, this bitch is lurking hard. (seaking? no?)



owned.


She's an archer who takes way too long to do everything. It tends to screw her over quite a bit, too.


SUDDENLY. Side characers. I'm not hatin', I'm just sayin'.


Best part of Asian Cinema: no matter what the circumstance, there will be a hallucination sequence. They all take turns feeding her... wut.


But she's still down in the sewer playing hide & seek with the giant tadpole.


And because she wins the game of hide & seek; she gains a friend! Who ironically just looted her dad's shop for food.


Aww look! He wants water.


"He's watching us"
FUCK YOU I WASN'T WATCHING SHIT.


They all wasted their bullets shooting at him; because he was "watching" them. hee. Since when do people run out of bullets in films?


Damn bro, you better make that shot! Oh, you can't because there are no bullets left. Your son fucked up again it seems. See, this family is all about the fuck ups - so they are constantly fumbling through things. Thanks to this, their dad dies after a beat down from the tadpole tail.


This is where everyone splits up. One goes running around, one almost fucks up AGAIN, and then this one gets the Jacob's Ladder treatment.


But first.. jokes about the economy.


DOES THIS EVEN WORK? IS THIS GUY THE KOREAN MCGYVER? FUCK.


OHSHI- HE NINJA'D US.


WHERE'D THAT NINJA GO?
He's under the over pass. No one looked, though. Well, one did, but not very well.


MEANWHILE - she's busy being a hamster.


Random serious parts are great. The movie's a like a collage of everything great.



THIS GUYS EYES. WTF MAN. WHYYYY.


Why you gotta speak English for like 5 seconds in every movie?? Dammit.


HOSHIT, time for that lobotomy. Or that thing that is going to do the opposite of what it's supposed to.


She wants a beer. A cold one. (out of context, for the win.)


Now that he's got his brain back or something... he holds someone hostage and starts throwing insults.


..protesting is referred to as demonstrations? That's what they kept calling it...
Also, why's he looking like Short Round ala Temple of Doom??


BRB.


See? She's coming back. Because tadpole isn't letting her go anywhere.


Demonstrators? (fuck year, her camera!)


They drop some Agent Yellow on the tadpole causing it to freak the fuck out.


Tadpole tried to eat her. Thankfully, she held onto it's inner tooth there.


Oh wait! Yeah, she dies. Yet, her friend doesn't. Does this make any sense considering they were both in the tadpole's belly? No. It does not. Who cares, though.


This fish for one, doesn't. AND YES, ITS A FISH. Hard to see, but it's a fucking fish.


PLOTHOLES? FUCK THEM. THERE IS NOW FIRE. Vagina mouth isn't appreciative of the fire.


Or maybe he is. I can't tell. He's a superior actor. Just look at that face.


Silly, that's not water. It's gasoline.


CANNOT BE UNSEEN. Setting that thing on fire wasn't enough. Also wow, epic battle scene at the end. I loved it and hated it.


HOW THE FUCK DO THEY GO FROM "oh shit, she's dead" TO "We're all better now, and now I have a son, since he didn't die in the tadpole's belly"?!?!?
Also, lovely "hey look, there could be another monster!" open ended movie. FUCK YEAH SEQUELS.

All that aside; I did like this movie. It's hard not to. There were some "wut" parts, but they were still fun parts. Just more encouragement for me to see more Korean films.

Tags: a famous entity, foreigns, i'm being dumb, movies
Subscribe

  • I put this in an email.

    I don't believe in leagues as some people suggest. I think there are some people that can't date because they're too different on some subjects or…

  • Just sayin

    Oh man, I woke up this morning and it was almost like I didn't even go to sleep. And I woke up early. That's highly unusual for me.

  • Danielle gave me a nostalgia bomb. It blew up in my face.

    TODAY'S GONNA BE MOTHER FUCKING CRAFT DAY. And oh my god, it's hard to write when I'm sitting here remembering this album from when I was like 14.…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 3 comments